


Itch

by Applefall



Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Borderline Personality Disorder, M/M, Referenced Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-25
Updated: 2015-10-25
Packaged: 2018-04-28 00:32:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5071018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Applefall/pseuds/Applefall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Patrick has an itch that only Pete knows how to help with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Itch

**Author's Note:**

> Im writing this because it's an idea I've had for quite a while and because I have bpd and it helps me to write about it. If anything else needs to be tagged please tell me! Sorry for the lack of writing, I haven't felt up to it in a while.
> 
> I might make a companion story to this one of Pete's side of the story, but no promises!

Patrick has an itch.

He knows who can make it go away. Who can make his skin stop crawling and his hands stop shaking and his body stop trembling. He knows who can calm him down when he's on fire and screaming. When he wants nothing more than to pull his own hair and bruise himself, he knows who can help him.

Pete. Pete, _pete, pete_. He's everything. _Perfect. Beautiful._ Patrick needs him like air. He needs his touch and his kisses and everything that makes him feel alive again. Everything that makes him feel real and whole and, sometimes, loved.

But sometimes there's a voice in his mind that screams and laughs and yells at him, tells him he's worthless and pathetic and that Pete's faking, Pete doesn't love him, it's a lie. And his throat closes up and he can't breathe, can't say a word about how he's feeling and how he doesn't want to be alive.

But Pete _always_ knows. He knows exactly how he's feeling all the time. He can look him in the eye and tell him gently that he knows, or squeeze his hand and say he cares. He can just tell when Patrick's feeling like that, burning and raw and tight, coiled up. Pete knows when he's not right in his body, when he's close to tearing himself apart.

And he knows exactly how to help him. In public he'll take his hand, squeeze it tightly and whisper reassurance. He'll hug him and smile widely, communicate with him through thought. But in private, when they're home and Patrick's screaming and dying and empty, Pete's there. He holds him when he screams and sobs, murmuring loving things. He calms him down when he's in a fit of rage, storming and throwing things and kicking.

He takes him to bed and spreads him out across the bed, looks him in the eyes. He says _Let me show you how much I love you._ Or he says _Let me know how you feel, tell me what I can do to make it better._ And when Patrick doesn't know how to make it better, Pete seems to, and he kisses him gently until Patrick can't breathe without him, until it's all come down to him.

Pete spends that time, telling him he's beautiful, amazing, talented beyond comparison. He makes him feel loved and content and happy, if only for a little while until Patrick's hurting again. He's everything to Patrick, he'd die if he was gone.

Pete understands him like no one else does, makes him happy like no one else does. He makes him feel valid and important. He's never impatient, never angry or annoyed. He doesn't mind Patrick's neediness or clinginess, doesn't mind it one bit. He takes care of him, does everything he can to make him feel whole and loved.

When Patrick's with Pete, that itch goes away. Because after years of gentle patience, of breakdowns and anger, of suicidal thoughts and threats, Pete's helped Patrick become whole, helped him bring together to the good and bad of himself and others, stitched him into someone better. Not entirely better, never completely better, but... _mostly_.


End file.
